Dennis

Not The News – Vol V

by on March 8, 2011 · 2 comments

Since this is the 5th installment, I was going to try and make this one really epic.  It was going to be a truly monumental work of snark wrapped inside a thinly constructed flaky crust of sarcastic goodness.  Then I made myself a bit hungry.  I then realized that you can’t spell “epic” without “p i e”, and […]

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Proceed With Caution

by on March 8, 2011 · 4 comments

The Cardinals looked great in a 10-4 dismantling of the Twins, and they didn’t even bring out the “big guns”, Holliday and Pujols.  Skip Schumaker is hitting .385, Matt Carpenter is hitting .375, Daniel Descalso .333, Colby Rasmus .381, Jon Jay .375, Allen Craig .364, Mark Hamilton .348, Yadier Molina .357, and David Freese is […]

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Riverboat Gambler

by on March 7, 2011 · 11 comments

“You got to know when to hold ’em, know when to fold ’em Know when to walk away and know when to run” ~Kenny Rogers (The Gambler) Those words of wisdom probably apply just as well to free agency as they do to poker, and there are certainly some parallels to be drawn.  You can’t win every […]

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That’s right.  It’s a “Honey-Do” list.  It’s a list of things that must be accomplished prior to opening day, or else you won’t be able to watch baseball in complete peace and quiet.  We’re not talking about your everyday “fix-the-gutter” or unclog the drain type DIY projects, either.  I’m talking serious stuff here, and you’re running […]

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I sincerely apologize to our 3 loyal readers for the delay in publishing this edition of “Not The News”, but there were some unavoidable delays outside of my control.  News of the Cubs basebrawl was not accompanied by any video evidence, so I had to work late into the night to track down at least […]

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Build it Backwards

by on March 3, 2011 · 2 comments

It’s one thing to look at the 2011 Cardinals and think about tweaking one thing here or making an adjustment there.  Rebuilding is an altogether different approach, but few people really want to think about the “R” word right now.  What about looking at the team by deconstructing it first?  It’s like taking apart your […]

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Follow The Money

by on March 2, 2011 · 2 comments

By my rough estimate, the 6 teams in the NL Central are going to start the 2011 season with a combined $544M committed to team payrolls.  Yikes.  Check out the breakdown: Cubs ~ $133M Cardinals ~ $109M Astros ~ $91M Brewers ~ $84M Reds ~ $76M Pirates ~ $51M If you split teams 1-3 and 4-6 […]

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Sometimes you have to laugh to keep from crying.  With that in mind, let’s hope that the M*A*S*H unit in Jupiter, Florida can patch Carp and Boggs back together without either one missing significant time.  I’m not actually all that familiar with the training staff, but I’m not above calling in Dr. “Hawkeye” Pierce, Winchester, […]

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BERKMAN HOMERS IN FIRST SPRING TRAINING GAME – NEARLY STRIKES BALLOON! The most amazing part about this highlight shot is the big fat baseball landing just on the other side of the left-centerfield wall.  Awesome camera work!  Oh wait.  There wasn’t any coverage of the game at all, because apparently nobody thought the members of […]

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Posted in: Fun

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As we’re nearing the 60% completion mark of the @STLDraftTB fantasy baseball draft, I’ve decided that now is a good time to sit down and evaluate my drafting strategy, assess my picks, and contemplate changes to my aforementioned strategy for the remaining rounds.  The complete guide that I published may be found here, but I’ve included […]

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Posted in: Fantasy Sports,Fun